We have chosen to have the same last name. If my wife ever ends up in a situation where she cannot request my presence I intend to say we are sisters and not lovers.

I realize that some people may object to me denying our relationship but personally it is important to make sure I am by her side rather than make a political point or get arrested and not being there when she needs me. There will be time later to make those points.

But there is another option.

We have a ‘Family’ Dr who knows us and understands our family and our wishes. Should there be an emergency and should I be locked out, all I need do is call our Dr and have him show up at the hospital. There’s nothing like another Dr escorting you in and while he takes care of the hospital’s legal needs, I’ll be caring for my partner.

Get a family Dr. Someone that can speak for you.
Not a lawyer. A Dr. Hospitals understand Dr’s.
When he walks in and says “This is my patient”
He then has control over treatment and visitors.

The tradition of marriage as it stands now is precisely to make two non related, consenting adults first custodian and next of kin to the other.
That’s it.
Nothing about that part of the tradition will change, just the kind of couple (gay essentially) who is married.
It’s easy to make gays and lesbians fair game for cruelty, under color of religion, prejudice…whatever.
But when it’s all said and done. A LOT of Constitutional laws are being broken.

I have as yet don’t know any straight people who will be harmed. No gay marriage is at the expense of anyone or anything to do with marriage.
How strange and frightening that our country has done the improbable.
In a time when so many hetero marriages and parental obligations fail and there are no laws that can prevent it,
Our country has managed to make it illegal in the law for gay people to do that duty.