The Republic of T.

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Bush Wants Bin Laden

Apparently in — what, at least in his tiny little mind, must be — the worst possible way.

See what happens when you take a day off from blogging? You miss some pretty major news. Like this bit via Alternet. Bush wants some man-on-man action with Bin Ladin.

Speaking of George Bush, with whom Sharon developed a very close relationship, Uri Dan recalls that Sharon’s delicacy made him reluctant to repeat what the president had told him when they discussed Osama bin Laden. Finally he relented. And here is what the leader of the Western world, valiant warrior in the battle of cultures, promised to do to bin Laden if he caught him: “I will screw him in the ass!”

Given the context, I’m assuming the proposed screwing would be administered with so much as a a drop of lubrication, or even the courtesy of a reach-around.

Of course, it’s worth pointing out (as the late great Molly Ivins did a while back) that Bush tends to be “all hat and no cattle,” with a penchant for writing checks he only wishes that his ass or any other part of his anatomy could cash. That, of course, is only when he’s writing checks with his mouth that he has no intention of his ass cashing, because he’s got American troops to do that.

The bit above, though, reminds me of another episode of Bush talking tough, as recounted by Molly Ivins.

The machismo is what I suspect is fake. Bush is just another upper-class white boy trying to prove he’s tough. The minute he is questioned, he becomes testy and defensive. That’s one reason they won’t let him hold many press conferences. When he tells stories about his dealings with two of the toughest men who ever worked in politics — the late Lee Atwater and the late Bob Bullock — Bush, improbably, comes off as the toughest mother in the face-down. I wouldn’t put money on it being true. Bullock, the late lieutenant governor and W’s political mentor in Texas, could be and often was meaner than a skilletful of rattlesnakes. Bush’s story is that one time, Bullock cordially informed him that he was about to fuck him. Bush stood up and kissed Bullock, saying, “If I’m gonna get fucked, at least I should be kissed.” It probably happened, but I guarantee you Bullock won the fight. Bush never got what made Bullock more than just a supermacho pol — the old son of a bitch was on the side of the people. Mostly.

The perfect absurdity of all this, of course, is that Bush’s identification with the sturdy yeomen of Midland (actually, oil-company executives almost to a man) is so wildly at variance with his real background. Bush likes to claim the difference between him and his father is that, “He went to Greenwich Country Day and I went to San Jacinto Junior High.” He did. For one year. Then his family moved to a posh neighborhood in Houston, and he went to the second-best prep school in town (couldn’t get into the best one) before going off to Andover as a legacy.

I other words, to borrow a line from a play I saw a long time ago, “Talking big is easy. From the proper distance.

But, as evan points out, there’s more going on here than Bush’s obvious homophobia in this statement, (because the worst thing that could happen to any man is to get fucked by another man), not to mention the inherent misogyny (because what we’re talking about here is rape, and putting the guy who gets fucked is on the same level as a woman, and of course that’s degrading for a guy).

If you view gay anal sex as an evil and abhorrent act, yet you’re willing to do it to exact revenge, it goes a long way to describe the president’s corrupt theology.

… Simply this: Bush is willing to DO what he believes is evil. This is EXACTLY what Jesus’ (or Ghandi’s) message was NOT. That is, while our weakest, basest impulses may compel us to act evil toward our enemies, the brilliance of these spiritual masters was to urge us toward a different path.

The emphasis here is on “what he believes is evil.” Because while that doesn’t necessarily make it so, that Bush would even joke about doing it (and there’s no indication that he was joking) . So much for Dubya following in the path of his favorite philosopher.

Bush, who turned away from drinking and toward religion in midlife, was raised Episcopalian and became Methodist when he married. Asked in a presidential campaign debate to name his favorite philosopher, he answered, “Christ. Because he changed my heart.” His descriptions of himself as a “compassionate conservative” and Saddam Hussein and terrorists as “evildoers” reflect moral convictions rooted in his faith.

Yeah, but, that doesn’t quite at up with wanting to wanting to “screw” your enemies “in the ass.” It’s been a long time since I taught Sunday school (and, yes, I used to teach Sunday school), but I remember enough to know that “screw him in the ass” probably isn’t among the answers to the question “What would Jesus do?” But then again, what Jesus would do and what Bush actually does are entirely unrelated.

“Screw him in the ass?” Caligula, maybe. But not Jesus.

One Comment

  1. “Reach around”, huh?


    I’ve always wondered how homosexual men have sex.

    Bush jumping Bin Laden’s bones.

    Not much chance of that happening.

    If anything, what with Bush being the blowhard, braggadocio wimp that he is, IT would be Bin Laden who would have the upper hand in turning Bush out as his bitch.