The Republic of T.

Black. Gay. Father. Vegetarian. Buddhist. Liberal.

Making the Cut On Marriage

I’ll be the first to admit that I’m still fuming over the Maryland Appeals Court gay marriage ruling. When I read the decision, it was a full 20 minutes before I could speak in more than one word at a time. The rest of the family got monosyllabic answers from me for a while.

Well, all except for the baby. But even she doesn’t take my mind of of it, because I keep remembering this paragraph from the decision.

Looking beyond the fact that any inquiry into the ability or willingness of a couple actually to bear a child during marriage would violate the fundamental right to marital privacy recognized in Griswold, 381 U.S. at 484-86, 493, 85 S. Ct. at 1681, 14 L. Ed. 2d 510, the fundamental right to marriage and its ensuing benefits are conferred on opposite-sex couples not because of a distinction between whether various opposite-sex couples actually procreate, but rather because of the possibility of procreation.

And every time I think about that paragraph I’ll think about stories like this one.

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The body of a newborn boy found Saturday in a garbage truck in Great Falls was probably abandoned the same day in Sterling Park, the Loudoun County Sheriff’s Office said yesterday.

The truck began its route early Saturday with pickups at 15 homes in Sterling Park, a community in eastern Loudoun, sheriff’s spokesman Kraig Troxell said.

The body of a newborn boy found Saturday in a garbage truck in Great Falls was probably abandoned the same day in Sterling Park, the Loudoun County Sheriff’s Office said yesterday.

The truck began its route early Saturday with pickups at 15 homes in Sterling Park, a community in eastern Loudoun, sheriff’s spokesman Kraig Troxell said.

The truck driver made additional pickups in Great Falls, in Fairfax County, before he discovered the body, Troxell said. “He found the body of the baby when he was loading trash from a smaller truck into a larger one,” Troxell said.

The body was in a black trash bag, Troxell said.

Fairfax police began an investigation into the death Saturday. Yesterday, after evidence pointed toward the infant being abandoned in Sterling Park, the Loudoun Sheriff’s Office took over the probe.

Understand, now, that whomever abandoned that baby — left him in a trash bag, at that — makes the cut for marriage in Maryland, according to the appeals court. You see, in order to abandon a baby, and leave it in a trash bag to die, you have to conceive and deliver that baby. The hubby and I, who have adopted two children we did not and could not have conceived, rather than abandoning a baby we could and did conceive.

So, whoever abandoned that baby and helped conceive it in the first place is more worthy of the benefits and protections of marriage, having removed all doubt by proving they can make babies together. The hubby and I, though we’ve proving every day that we can raise children even if we can’t make babies together — even though it takes longer than conception, gestation and delivery combined — do not.

And then, via Pandagon, there’s this little gem of a video that Amanda dug up, about a man who (a) beat his wife and (b) forced his son to videotape it.

Now, the hubby and I have never been violent with each other, let alone doing so in front of our children, or asking one of them to videotape something like that. But these parents have obviously met and exceeded the minimum requirement to be married, and qualify for the benefits and protections of marriage, as far as the Maryland Court of Appeals is concerned. Because they have already reproduced, so the possibility of procreation that the majority of the Maryland court sets as the minimum requirement for marriage.

Note: I’m not blaming the woman for her abuse here, but making the point that even a lowlife like the abuser — who terrorizes not just his wife but his children by making them witnesses to and even participants in his brutality, is worthy of marriage. That union and his status as a legal spouse are justified because he’s proven he can make babies with his wife. What he subjects them to after conception and delivery can’t even disqualify him from that.

Not so for us.

Can ya blame me for being angry?

3 Comments

  1. Baby…She??

    Did I miss an announcement somewhere?

  2. Uh…Terrance….You can’t just slide an announcement like that into the middle of the conversation. If you are saying what I think you are saying, then CONGRATS!!

  3. I am saying what you think I’m saying. I slipped it into an earlier post too. I just haven’t said it in a big way yet, because when it comes to adoption nothing is certain until the papers are signed and the clock has run out.

    But, yes, we’re adopting a baby girl.

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