I am very new to this journey - am 32 and have only started coming out 4 months ago. I have a husband and two beautiful daughters. It has been a pain-filled and difficult few months. The part about this that gives me the most peace is that I know now that my daughters will be raised to know in a most real sense that love is love is love.

I would have tried to teach them this even if I had kept on denying myself, but now, by finally living my truth, they will experience this as a part of their reality. It won’t be because I will make a specific lesson of it but by entering this community, by hopefully one day finding a solid relationship with a woman, it will simply become a part of the fabric of their lives.

I love my girls more than I could ever express. Knowing that I can raise them to know that they can be themselves and love whoever the heck they want to love regardless of colour or religion or orientation - that they will never know the pain of denying who they are….this feels like the biggest gift.

Just curious:

How did you get to be a “father” if you are gay? I thought they compared being gay to being black. You’re born that way and that’s it. I don’t know too many black people that changed their color except for Michael Jackson. Any relation?

Just over five years ago, my husband and I adopted a four-day-old baby boy, whose birth mother chose us to be his adoptive parents because, in her words, she felt we would raise him with unconditional love and give him the best education. He is now a happy, healthy five year old who loves to run and climb and swim. He’s a smart kid who’s already reading, and surprises me at times by reading something I didn’t know he could read. He goes to the library every three week, and checks out books that we then read to him for the next three weeks. He’s a five year old boy who last week spontaneously jumped into my arms, gave me a hug, and said “Daddy, you’re the best,” and who has also declared that when he grows up he wants to live next door to his Daddy and Papa.

We did not bring him in the world, but we are raising him, loving him, and equipping him to make his own way in the world and hopefully leaving it a better place for his having been in it. If not bringing him into the world makes me less of a father, what does bringing him into the world make the man who — having gotten him conceived — walked away from the rest of the job? One that we have happily, willingly taken on, and would do so again in a heartbeat? Is the bar for fatherhood now set no higher than ejaculation?

I am black. I am gay. I am as black as I am gay, and as gay as I am black. I have been black for as long as I have been gay, and I have been gay for as long as I have been black. I have been both for as long as I have been a person in the world. The only way you or anyone else can claim to know differently is to have walked around in my skin for 38 years.

What he did say was children were coming to him about homosexuals wanting to have sex with them. To which he replied “I am not in the mood to play with THEM who are trying to kill our children. Them being child molesters, of which he was a victim of. Hopefully, you are not going to research children who commit crimes to do another 2 wrongs make it right theory.

How did you get to be a “father” if you are gay? I thought they compared being gay to being black. You’re born that way and that’s it. I don’t know too many black people that changed their color except for Michael Jackson. Any relation?

Attorneymom said:

Why don’t you go and mess with the Muslims??? They are also against homosexuality….

Ah, yes. Leave my religion (whose claiming to be holier than any) alone! It cannot bear the scrutiny of logic and perspectives — because it requires the presence of absolute blind faith and surrender of thought and reasoning. Nice one for the tactic of weapons of mass distraction.

Why don’t we leave Christians alone? Because this country has been hijacked by conservative Christians who insist on taking our rights away. Because this country is run by politicians who play the Christian card to their advantage. And because when it says “In God We Trust” on the dollar bill, I’m pretty sure “God” is referring to the Christian God, not the Muslim God.

Since the U.S. is run by Christians,

Nobody is forcing you to marry a woman or force you into single motherhood (although I suspect you’re pro-life and if you are, you’re for forcing single motherhood on people that may not want to be single mothers- but I’ve noticed logic is lost on you folks).

You’ve got your life. Feel free to marry a man and procreate as much or as little as you like. feel free to engage in penis to vagina sex until you knock yourself out (or up, in your case). Feel free to forego blowjobs, handjobs and whatever else you find unsavory. Godspeed and god bless! What you do with your life- is your right.

As for your obvious hatred at Muslims, think about it. If you have a fire right next door to yourself or a fire in another country, which do you tackle first. You must be incredibly dumb to think people should fly over to another country and fight the fire there rather than ignore the fire right next to their house. You guys are just jealous of Muslims for being straight-up about their homophobia. Playa haters.

a child DESERVES a good home and a home with a man and a woman is not always the perfect place due to the occupants

also, i think when we start thinking of relationships in terms of sexual behavior, we start problems. that sort of thing leads to AIDS and HIV

as does ignorance.

maybe if some folks who claim to be christian not believe that this country belongs to them and the rest of us are just passengers, there wouldn’t be any problems.