Parents talk a lot, amongst ourselves, about the unending work of … well … parenting, and less about the immense rewards of that work — when being your kids’ mom or dad pays off with moments of incredible “pride and joy.” That may be due to the reality that, as I’ve pointed out before, any mention of much else to any one else is met with derision, hostility, and other things that most of us are too tired to deal with by the end of the day.
Unfortunately, none of this is anything anyone wants to hear from a parent, because once you’re a parent you kind of cease to be a person, in the sense that you’re not supposed to:
1. have so much as a thought for yourself,
2. want anything for yourself (beyond food, clothing, and shelter)
3. have needs of your own (beyond food, clothing, shelter)
And along with above, you’re certainly not supposed to have regrets or misgivings. And if you do, you’re supposed to keep them to yourself, or face the flame-throwers.
There are things parents are usually safer off talking about with one another, because, at the very least, we do so without having to apologize for not being perfect, and qualify everything we say with how much we really do love our children. Usually, we give each other permission to be imperfect and credit for loving our children dearly.
But for many of us, those moments of “pride and joy” are far more abundant than we talk about, even amongst ourselves. I think that should change. So, here’s one of my “favorite dad moments” from this weekend.
(more…)
Posts
